Welcome to Atlanta Where the Playas Play

Boyfriend:  “Today is going to be the worst day ever!”

Me: “Because I’m leaving?”

Boyfriend: “…Yes….and because I could fall asleep standing up.”

                This year, so far, has been my biggest travel year life to date.  Four trips booked or taken, thus far, and all east of the Mississippi - as to maintain my claim to fame that I have never been west of that river.   I have no aversion to traveling west.  I just don’t know people who live there who want me to come see them.  Anyway, last Thursday I took my third trip of 2011.  Went to Atlanta, GA, to see my oldest and dearest friend.   (She’s not old.  We’ve just been friends since diapers.  And she bought me a teddy bear with a yellow ribbon around his neck for my first birthday party ever.)  Apparently that’s the equation for a life time of Michael W. Smith “Friends are Friends Forever” friendship? 

                I’ve probably flown only ten times my whole entire life.  Maybe twelve.  Doesn’t matter.  And I’ve flown to see her like four of those times.  Thankfully she’s always lived in much more desirable climates than I have – even though Niagara Falls is supposedly the honeymoon destination of the world.  Which – if you’re planning your honeymoon, I’d say maybe breeze by this location in the travel guide.  You’ll certainly be sorely disappointed.  Anyway, she wisely, went to college in West Palm Beach, FL.  And lucky for me – I visited there a few times to defrost for a week or so on spring breaks.  Now she lives in Atlanta.  And after this “Spring” we’ve had - which has been alternating rain and snow until like yesterday when we switched over to just rain, I was ready to see some sun.     

                Friday was beautiful – like gorgeous, and we sat by the pool for an hour.  This is probably the best thing that has ever happened to me.  I got some sun.  Was careful not to get burned. (High five from Mom?)  And then we went shopping.  I bought zero shoes and only dresses - still following my plan to only buy dresses and shoes for the rest of my life.  Probably won’t last long, but that’s all I want right now - so if you have a link to awesome dresses send it my way. (Facebook already told me about ModCloth – but I’m open to any and all others.)  So pretty much awesome day.  Poolside and mall sounds like a little piece of heaven.  Well until my friend’s daughter filled her diaper with something I’ve never seen come out of a tiny human before in my life.  (And I’ve changed more than two diapers.)  Kids, always good for a laugh – and an inopportune need for a new diaper.

                I think the diaper was a sign of things to come because from that point on everyone except me and the baby was SICK with capitals S-I-C and K.  Worked out well that I was there to hold the baby.  And to make magic cupcakes.  Which apparently a few ended up in the sink in another comedy of errors that involved a diaper change.  But I had a so fun time seeing my friends and meeting their baby.  And now the good TSA people of Atlanta have a picture of naked me instead of someone’s Gram.  Good of them to switch us and let her go through the metal detector and me through the x-ray picture taker machine after I had gotten in the metal detector line - on purpose.

                Also thanks to the Phillies being in town we missed out on a Ludacris and Jermaine Dupri concert at Turner Field – which I would have sang right along with them because who doesn’t want to be welcomed to Atlanta where you can “...hit streets, see gangsta’s roamin’ and parties don’t stop till eight in the mornin’ “ by Ludacris himself?  Worked out anyway because of the throwing up sickness that happened. Plus i don't like the Phillies.  And I super don't like them in their throwback jerseys.  So it was for the best that we missed it.  

See?  Stupid. And ugly.

               As far as my 2011 travels go - Atlanta wins this year.  Based on the fact that I didn't have to walk anywhere.  And it was WARM.  And I got to meet the baby. I should very much like to go back there again some time.  Now we just have to hope I don't get the plague they had.

                 

Keeping up With the Joneses...and Maybe Even the Kardashians?

                It’s 2011.  People have smart phones.  And by people, I mean mostly everyone in the whole entire world carries a phone that does more than talk and text.  And everyone now includes my boyfriend.  As of last Saturday.  We went to Verizon and got him his iPhone.  And he thinks it’s magic.  Personally, I’m on my second BlackBerry so I think that makes me a smart phone user for like three years. The magic is long gone.  Now it’s a necessity.  And I’m your stereotypical BlackBerry user – the girl that literally gets anxiety when that little red light is flashing.  I can do nothing else until I make it stop.  Even though it’s nothing urgent.  I mean no one is going to email/text me to tell me someone died.  It’s usually just email from Shutterfly trying to get me to buy some pictures, or a book of pictures, or a mug with a picture on it.

                Anyway for a new smart phone owner I guess it looks like magic.  So far these are the magical things it does.  It has Google Maps.  It encouraged him to get a Gmail account.  It has Pandora.

                “You do realize that all the smart phones have been doing all these things for years right? And also that I’ve had a Pandora account for the better part of a decade.”

                “But look how awesome this is.”

                “Please turn off that crap before I throw your new phone into a wall”  Evil pouty face until it stops.   

What? He was playing loud, shoot em up, Gangsta, eff your  Mother music from the early 90’s – during the commercials of my fave television program Modern Family with the volume of the TV on at the same time.  So many things wrong with that scenario – beginning and ending with the fact that he was singing along with Ice Cube – who I know from Law and Order SVU.  So if the guy ended up casted on Law and Order, I’m saying his music prob wasn’t so awesome to begin with?   But that’s just me.  Boyfriend will argue otherwise.

                

             Also he had like three hours while I was at school to play as much gangster music as he wanted to without a single complaint from the girlfriend. 

                There is one thing I am super excited about his iPhone for though - he agreed to let me Skype with my sister and niece using his phone.  He downloaded the app last night and I am pumped.  To be determined if I’m going to be allowed to touch the phone or not.  Something about setting me up with the phone in its case that stands up.  Whatever – I’m not the one that drops their phone twice a day.  It’s probably safer with me anyway.

Story of my life. As of 5 days ago.  

               One other thing.  If anyone really does know some real magic - as in spells.  The kind that would make me look great in a bathing suit in like - seven days.  Please let me know.  It's kind of an emergency.  And I'm not looking to give up eating ice cream. Ever.  (That's why I need the magic.)

Sweet Home Alabama

One time, I visited two of my most favorite people in the whole entire world, in Alabama.  That was a few years ago.  They took me on a tour of the area.  Showed me the Alabama campus where Em attended and where her heart is.

Today, she emailed pleading for help after her college town was demolished by a tornado earlier this week - suggesting that donating to the Red Cross Disaster Relief is the best way we can physically help out.

So - while we're all grateful that Em and Cliff are safe and sound, maybe you have a few extra dollars this week (after all, it is Pay Day) to chip in and help some strangers who lost everything they own in this world?

End of an Era

                Well.  It’s official.  After half a decade, 110,000 miles (80% of which were probably accumulated on the 90), one car accident, two speeding tickets, one smashed in passenger window per the crack head in Delaware Park and 47 jump starts, I bought a new vehicle.  Goodbye Tucson, hello glorified Tucson.  Ok not really, but kind of.  I bought a Honda CR-V.  Which is like a better Tucson for all intents and purposes?  Except with all those neat features that the Tucson doesn’t have like starting when I turn the key.

 

                Boyfriend tells me that some poor high school student is going to go to an auction somewhere and end up buying the Tucson for like five dollars or something. I'm still hoping someone lets me light it on fire. Just in case they don't, I’m thinking I need to provide the next owner with a disclaimer or at least a revision to the owner’s manual.  And a set of complimentary jumper cables.  It would look something like this:

                Hope you like it super hot or super cold – the fan only works on HIGH.

Find a significant other who follows you to your job and to school and pretty much anywhere you might have to turn the car off and go inside and need to turn it on again to leave. 

Sorry about the Oxy-Clean in the cargo area and there may or may not be throw up in the passenger side door.  You can thank my boyfriend for that.  I know I did.

You will need a set of jumper cables, a spare battery and probably you should just go ahead and hire your own mechanic to ride with you everywhere.

You’re welcome for the new, upgraded radio.  Some Tucson problem solving internet board lied to me and said that would fix the battery issues so I bought that one.

As far as the “holy sh**” handle on the passenger side goes? That inexplicably fell and smacked my friend in the face one day.  It’s now in the compartment in the door – maybe super glue will help.

The tires are crap.  That’s why you have this car now and not me.  Get some new ones.

I used to have a key chain clicker.  That’s gone the way of the dinosaur.  Doesn’t matter much anyway – the locks only work when they feel like it.  Usually you have to go around all Flintstone-like, climbing over seats to let people in.

The left turn signal has started to choose when it will click off after completing the turn.  Remember this and don’t be ‘that guy’ who drives around making everyone think he’s about to make a left hand turn into oncoming traffic or the river.

I think that’s about all the tricks of the trade.  Guess it was about time to get a new, dependable vehicle.  Boyfriend confirmed with something like “I’m not jumping that thing one more time, you're going to start something on fire.”  All I know is the next Tucson owner should not plan to go farther than walking distance from their home.  So long Tucson, I’m on to smaller and shinier things. 

The Tucson's Successor

Almost Famous...?

         So today I hop on YouTube to listen to some music in my continuing effort to drown out the Cupid Shuffle and on my recommended videos I see this: 

                            Yes, that is, in fact, me.  I obv sent it to Boyfriend who replied with:

“You still make that frown face.”

“For the record.”

What. Ever.

I always tell Boyfriend that I used to be on tv. 

                Now to explain: for those of you unfamiliar with early 90’s NY capital district tv programming – which, ironically enough, I am not familiar with any other programming aside from these commercials.  My father made them.  He needed kids.  We were kids.  We were in the commercials.  My brother got lucky enough to hide under a sheet.  Even though he kept poking his fingers through.  But I didn’t even get to really wear the mask.  Apparently I needed to be upset that the fat guy was eating all my candy.  And since we weren’t allowed to trick or treat the whole concept was foreign to me anyway and that’s how you end up with the frown face seen here.

                There was one day we had to ride the carousel at the mall for like four hours straight.  I never rode that thing again after.  And one day we had to go to Fort William Henry during the off season and apparently they keep dogs there to guard and we had to pay more attention to not step in dog crap than we could to whatever commercial we were supposed to be a part of.  Thankfully I don’t think any of these have made it into circulation and I’m hoping those VHS’ are packed away under lock and key somewhere in my parent’s basement.

                In summary, I’m not only a world famous blogger – with the overwhelming popularity of 13 followers, I am also 200-something hits on YouTube worth of awesome and I know you all are jealous.  And in my defense – I had PANTS on that day.  The socks would not have been visible if I had not had to tuck the pants up under the costume.  The haircut we won’t talk about, I can't explain the sneakers and the teeth got fixed with a year and a half of braces.  

TGI.....T?

                This week has been the kind of week that I just thought every day after Monday was Friday and have been continually disappointed when I come to realize that this is not, in fact, the case.  Today was the kind of morning that I ironed one thing - didn’t like it, tried three different shirts, ran out of time and ended up in skinny black pants and flats with a bath robe sweater.  And these kinds of outfits are typically reserved for Fridays, and since tomorrow is actually a 50% off jeans day at the office I chose to wear this today – thus compounding my state of confusion as to what day today is. (It’s Thursday.)  And now as this day has dragged by, I can’t believe I have to come here (here = work) again tomorrow.

                I should have known it was going to be a long week when I chose to stay up till 1:15am watching Mildred Pierce on HBO – which is one of those disappointing shows that you can’t turn off during, but are not pleased you watched the whole thing when it’s over.  You know the type – and there’s still one part left of the mini-series so since I made it this far I’m going to have to go ahead and find out how it all ends.  Even though I wiki-ed it and I already know how it all ends.

                Then on Tuesday it snowed.  Not like accumulation snow.  But it snowed all day.  And the news people so kindly reminded me that this time last year it was a balmy 80 – something degrees (quite atypical of Buffalo, NY but nonetheless desired by all.)  So I told Boyfriend we had to move to warmer weather and he said Tampa. I weather.com-ed Tampa and it was supposed to be in the 80’s there all week and a high of 87 by Thursday.  I told him we had to be there by Thursday.  But after looking at like six houses online in our price range and hating all of their kitchens I informed him he had to pick a different city.  So that’s a work in progress since the day is almost over and we didn’t move yet.  Plus – he has this policy: No moving to geographic regions where adverse weather conditions could result in him coming home to no house.  And since Florida has hurricanes and hurricanes can take away houses we’re not allowed to go there.   So I don’t know why he said Tampa in the first place.  I don’t think he was taking me seriously.  I’m actually pretty sure he never takes me seriously. 

                The highlight of my week was that this semester’s worst class ever lasted only one hour last night.  So I chose to continue my training for half-marathon training with the unexpected free time.  But I’m tired of running on a treadmill so I switched to the elliptical and some guy who didn’t choose deodorant yesterday insisted on standing directly in front of my machine to watch the basketball game on tv till I started coughing obnoxiously till he got the hint and went back to where ever it was that he came from and I could finish my workout without passing out from trying not to breathe.

                Now it’s the end of another work day.  I already had anxiety over what’s for dinner, read a couple hundred recipes and settled on sloppy joes or chicken a la king.  Boyfriend chose sloppy joes.  And since all I want in the whole entire world is a hot dog off the grill.  But I’m not allowed to have that per the snow and the coldness because Boyfriend will not suffer though inclement weather to grill me one even after I suggested he grill it in the garage so the above would no longer be an issue – sloppy joes it is.

                Anyway – hope your week has gone faster than mine has.  Weekend plans anyone?  It is supposed to finally reach springish temperature here.  Hopefully we can walk the dog – I’m tired of watching him pace around the house. Ohhh – and maybe we can grill that hot dog too?

That right there is the recipe for a great hot dog - except the relish goes in the middle.  Not on top of the ketchup.

I Made These Last Night...You Should Make Them Today

                 Creeped some blogs yesterday.   (Google Chrome is telling me 'creeped' is not a word. But if OMG and LOL got added to the Oxford Dictionary I feel like I can say creeped if I want to.)  Found this one and subsequently this recipe.  Yes - those are, in fact, cupcakes with cookie dough inside.  I made them last night.  You might want to tonight.   All the people in your life will love you forever if you do.  I managed to use a bit less brown sugar in the cupcakes – not on purpose but because I can’t follow a recipe apparently.  But no one has seemed to notice. 

                And since it’s not Friday and this is not a regularly scheduled blog post.  That’s all I’ve got.  But seriously.  You should all make these magical cupcakes.

Her blog post's photos are far superior to my Blackberry shot.   But they taste even better than they look.